Marathon Vent

The Marathon is quickly approaching.

T Minus 13 Days and Counting!

But instead of excitement, I'm feeling rather demoralized even though I know tapering should be my focus now.

Except that I feel like I have been tapering for the last 6 weeks.

I haven't been running my best lately.

There have been too many skipped runs, runs cut short and less than stellar splits. I know I should be doing speed work ... but I just don't. I know I should be doing Strength Training on non-running days ... but I just don't.

Self-Doubt is trying to creep in.

More than once I've thought about not doing the Full. "I can take the turn at the Half" I tell myself, a contingency previously reserved for the if I wake up sick that day emergency only, but suddenly it's trying to creep it's way into my plan for the day status.

The little voice keeps saying:

• You only ran 20 miles once
• You bailed on your 20 miler (this Saturday) and only did 10
• You are still running too slow (I keep comparing myself to my running friends)
• You haven't been running your best lately

But I keep feeling like if I don't run it ... I will have failed at my goal.

You see, I have this bad habit ... REALLY BAD HABIT ... of giving up on things as soon as I see the end in sight.

I don't know why ... but I do.

Case in point:

• My 900 miles in 2009. I planned my runs and plotted out the last month and would have reached my goal, right on the dot ... BUT the last two weeks of 2009, I ran ONCE! I went from running 4 times a week consistently over 3 months to ONCE IN 15 days. I ended up with 854 ... 46 miles short.
  

I'm afraid that I'm doing it again.

Now don't get me wrong, I LOVE RUNNING! I love how I feel after I run. I love the looks I get when I tell people I ran X miles. My migraines are pretty much gone. My body is getting fit (although I don't see the difference on the scale, I feel better about what I see in the mirror). I love keeping track of my runs (yes, I am OCD :) I love the clothes, the gear, I LOVE IT ALL!

BUT ... I am getting a little demoralized about not speeding up and not running my plan.

I never had a doubt about completing the 26.2. I don't even have a doubt about finishing it now ... I know I can do it, but I'm just not-feeling-it!

I'm not sure how this will play out ... but I'm taking it one day at a time.

Ok, I get it!

So, last night I had dinner with one of my Running Buddies (i.e. my mom) and I was telling her how demoralized I was after the Half and how hard it was to get motivated for this full marathon. I admitted that as I looked at my training schedule I was starting to fear the miles. She gave me a pep talk and told me it would not be a defeat to wait and do the marathon a little later when I felt more ready.

It didn't really help but I know she's right.

When I got home and chilled out for the evening, I got a call from her to change the channel because the Biggest Loser was on. Not being a avid watcher I was not too interested until she told me they were running a marathon this episode. (Read Episode Recap here)

A sign!

I watched the final four Biggest Loser candidates and shared in their trials and tribulations through the 26.2 mile course. I got so inspired I started doing squats during the show! It renewed my Marathon Motivation!

I'm excited about today's run and tomorrows and the following one!

It was definitely something I needed to see!

I finally get what the hype is about! I am a Biggest Loser convert :)

Recovering & Looking towards the future

Thanks to all of you for all the wonderful comments on my post 13.1 Afterthoughts: A Moment of Doubt, I truly appreciate the faith and motivation. :)

--

I am feeling better today.

My post-RACE-um Depression is starting to subside and I can go up and down stairs without feeling like my quadriceps have been set on fire.

I've also done alot of MULLING over (the last two run-less days) about the 26.2 and being that the 13.1 (i.e. my A race) is now behind me I am looking to 2010 and pondering what lies ahead.

Potential Race Schedule:

January 31, 2010	ING 26.2 Marathon MY FIRST MARATHON!
March 7, 2010	13.1 Miami Beach
March ?, 2010	Mercedes Benz Cooperate 5K Run
April 17, 2010	7 Mile Bridge Run - LOTTERY
May ??, 2010	Tour Of The Gables
May ??, 2010	She Rox - Triathlon
July 4, 2010	4th of July 5K
September 26, 2010	Escape to Miami - Triathlon
October 31, 2010	Halloween Half Marathon
November 7, 2010	NYC Marathon - LOTTERY
November ??, 2010	Space Coast Marathon back up in case I don't get in NYC
November ??, 2010	Waterford 5K
November 26, 2010	Turkey Trot 10K

Wow! I'm getting excited just looking at it.

Wishing everyone a Happy Hump day!

13.1 Afterthoughts: A Moment of Doubt

Training Completed.

Race Run.

Milestone Reached.

Bucket List Item Checked.

So now what?

It still feels too soon to start running again today although I know I should probably get out there for a short easy run to loosen up the tightness.

But I'm having trouble getting motivated today.

Actually, I've been feeling a little different since I crossed the finish line ... and not in a good way.

It was very anti-climatic.

Now, don't get me wrong. I know what I did was a great feat of traveling 13.1 under my own power. It's taken me alot to get here and I am darned proud of getting it done! The race was challenging but it did not break my mind or my spirit! I can now say I am stronger than 13.1 Miles!

But as soon as I finished, I realized there was a monster that looms around the corner.

It remained hidden behind the 13.1 because this race came first and I needed to stay focused but now what lies ahead is:


This one I am pretty much doing alone.

My running buddies are excited about doing the ING too but the Half Marathon, they don't think they are ready for the Full yet.

AND WHAT MAKES ME THINK I AM!?!

I do know two people who are doing the Full, both acquaintances. One has done lots of marathons before and the other signed up last year and turned at the 13.1 cross over and he has been running and doing TRIS for a while.

WHAT MAKES ME THINK I CAN DO THIS!?!

I keep telling myself if the day comes and I don't think I'm ready I can take the turn at 13.1 and live to fight another day ... BUT I DON'T WANT THAT!?!?!

Then I remember:

I have never been the ATHLETE!
I have never been the Lithe Thin Svelte one!
I'm the RUNT OF THE LITTER!
The Chubby Chic!
What am I doing here? Standing at this point, signed up for a Marathon in 11 Weeks.
I HAVE NO RIGHT!?!

... and of course in your darkest moments the light reaches you:

I AM A RUNNER!
By John Bingham, aka “The Penguin”

I am a runner because my runs have names. I do tempo runs and threshold runs and fartlek runs. I do long, slow runs and track workouts. My runs are defined, even if my abs are not.

I am a runner because my shoes are training equipment, not a fashion statement. The best shoe for me is the one that makes me a better runner. I choose the shoe that goes with my running mechanics, not with my running outfit.

I am a runner because I don’t’ have running outfits. I have technical shirts and shorts and socks. I have apparel that enhances the experience of running by allowing me to run comfortably. I can say “Coolmax” and “Gore-tex” in the same sentence and know which does what.

I am a runner because I know what effort feels like, and I embrace it. I know when I’m pushing the limits of my comfort and why I’m doing it. I know that heavy breathing and an accelerated heart rate – things I once avoided – are necessary if I want to be a better runner.

I am a runner because I value and respect my body. It will whisper to me when I’ve done too much. And if I choose to listen to that whisper, my body won’t have to scream in pain later on.

I am a runner because I am willing to lay it all on the line. I know that every finish line has the potential to lift my spirits to new highs or devastate me, yet I line up anyway.

I am a runner because I run. Not because I run fast. Not because I run far.

I am a runner because I say I am. And no one can tell me I’m not.

Still have my doubts! I am still afraid! But this CHUBBY CHIC is going doing FIGHTING!?!?!?!

Tuesday Kick In The Butt

I will begin with Runner's World Daily Kick In The Butt:

Nonrunners cannot see how they can afford the time to run every day. But runners cannot imagine getting through a single day without it.
~ Kevin Nelson, The Runner's Book of Daily Inspiration

So fitting!

--

I am so glad I ran yesterday.

I had to option to either do a cross training day or do a 5 mile run and when I got home it was a toss up but I finally decided to go for the 5 miler.

It would be more of a recovery run than anything else. I did a 7 miler on Saturday and a 4 miler yesterday. But I had been toying with the Marathon Pace Wristband Creator throughout the day and decided to run it at my Half Marathon pace.

I didn't print it out but rather decided to run sub-11 minute miles all the way through since the math would be easier!

I ran my usual route but rather than take the west side of the Street, I ran it on the east side of the street and it felt like I was running a completely different course.

Mile 1	0:10:27	0:10:27
Mile 2	0:11:07	0:21:51
Mile 3	0:11:45	0:34:10
Mile 4	0:11:00	0:45:02
Mile 5	0:11:43	0:57:05
.36 Mile	0:03:51	1:00:56

I was able to stay on pace the whole time with no real discomfort. Now the challenge is to maintain it on my 10 Mile long run this weekend!

In other news, I have discovered that my hip pain is actually caused by my hamstrings being weak. First it was my quads causing knee pain and now it's my Hamstrings causing Hip pain.

Geesh!

Today I am hitting the Cross training and adding some Hamstring focused exercises!

Happy Tuesday!

I SIGNED UP FOR MY FIRST MARATHON!

Ok, so I have weighed my options, done the pros/cons list, gotten a reality check and even tips from a Vet (Thanks, Jamie!) and it is now official.

I have signed up for the ING MIAMI Marathon.

I'm about 99% sure I will not be doing the Disney Marathon ... but there still is that 1% lingering :)


This will be my first marathon!

The first of many, so I hope!

Also, Don’t forget about the Nathan Hydration water bottle giveaway!

Wish me luck!

Wednesday

I am torn.

Suddenly yesterday, I became indecisive about whether I should do the Disney Marathon on 1/10/2010 or the ING Miami Marathon on 1/31/2010.

Here's the Breakdown:

• Disney Marathon has a better course. You do have to run on roads but there are people all the way through. According to some course reviews I've read the ING Miami course becomes a little desolate after the 13.1 breakaway. Your running in downtown, there are not as many people doing the full and you might spot some homeless people hanging out.
  
• Disney Marathon has a lot more people. The first mile (some said 3-4 miles) will be slow so I may not be able to gauge my true run time but then again my first marathon should not be about time, right?
  
• Disney Marathon has ALOT more photo ops. There are photographers all over the parks at key points. Giving opportunity for multiple race pics. ING Miami just has the end and I've had some narly end race pics :\ would hate for it to happen here.
  
• If I did the Disney I would need to stay at a hotel ... means I'd need to spend more $$$
• If I did the Disney, I could invite my uncle and his family to come see me and cheer me on. He lives in Tampa and I know he would (he did it when I competed in Judo). Also, could possibly invite my estranged father with the excuse that it is DISNEY and tell him to bring his family to come see me and ask him to bring my Puerto Rican Grammy (whom I ADORE!). Which would then give me the excuse of brining my Cuban Grammy who would love going to Disney ... it's win/win all over the place.
  
• Doing the Disney will push me up 3 weeks in my training ... not necessarily a good thing :\
  

I've asked for a couple of opinions (ok, two so far) and I've gotten the same response:

"Why not do both!"

Not entirely UN-feasible. They are 3 weeks apart.

But what if I decide after doing the Full that I NEVER WANT TO RUN 26.2 EVER AGAIN ... I've heard it said, so I dunno.

In my head, I think I will be HARDCORE and run in to the shute saying "Woo-Hoo, let's do it again" ... but that could just be the G.I. Jane/Lara Croft/Electra Me that lives inside my head! What if the outter me (the one that feels pain) doesn't agree?

I could register for both and then do the Disney Full and take the turn on the ING Half. That's alot of money though :\

Hmmm, So much to consider.

Anyway, Today's run has me psyched. It wasn't a personal record or anything near it. I had trouble getting out the door, my IPOD Shuffle's earphone (I HOPE IT'S JUST THE EARPHONES) died. I even had to stop for a 2-minutes at the end of mile 3 because my left foot was going numb (my Quads again? I think.) but it still got me excited about the Half and the Full Marathon. Woo-Hoo!

Mile 1: 10:24.4
Mile 2: 11:15.5
Mile 3: 11:12.2
Mile 4: 11:57.4
.03 M: 00:23.6

Avg HR 169
Max HR 180

Temp 88.0 °F
Humidity 63%
Scattered Showers (it was clear skies where I was)

After, I did Yoga for Runners (I love Polly!) and had a stab at Foam Roller (I think I'm gonna like it!)

Then I did:

50 Sit-ups
20 Push-Ups
50/50 Under-The-Leg Lifts

... while I watched the tail end of The Biggest Loser. I had never seen it before. It's not terrible ... would need to watch more to form an opinion.

On deck for this evening:
5 Mile run

Have a Happy Hump Day!

Oh-Oh Spagetti-o!

Ok, I know I'm not supposed to... but I have set a mental goal for my first half-marathon.

Of course I want to finish. But also, I want to finish it in about 2:45:00 (ok, I want to finish in less than 2:59:54 which is what someone I know did it in!)

It's a modest goal. Not impossible.

I did the 7 mile bridge last April and averaged 12 minute miles the whole way (with a lot less training under my belt) and also on my PDR which is an 8 mile run, also in April.

The difference is that in my head 13.1 miles is not insurmountable.

Neither is 26.2.

Does that mean I will eventually be a candidate for a ULTRA? I don't know (we never know where life will take us) and I'm actually gearing myself more to Triathlons (being that I had never learned to ride a bike or swim until the recent past and beating those is a big deal to me!).

But Madonna's Morocco Ultra sounds inciting and the Rim2Rim2Rim sounds like fun and even the Great Wall Marathon sounds like the cat's pajamas but when I think about doing them the money seems like more of a barrier than the distance.

Is it just that since I've never run more than 8 miles I don't know what it will really require of me? Ignorance is bliss and all that?

The reality is, I don't know where this ride will take me but it's awfully fun to dream. And I am finally starting to worry less about my weight and even forgetting to weigh myself some mornings (EGAD! That would have been INCONCEIVABLE to me in the past!)

Today's Runner's Quote Sums it all up best I think:

People begin running for any number of motives, but we stick to it for one basic reason-to find out who we really are.
~ George Sheehan, M.D.

On deck for this evening: Today is a Rest (from running) day so I will be doing P90x as well as my challenge sets with the addition of:

• Triceps Push Downs (Michele Obama rocks these for her great arms)
  
• Hammer Curls (These too!)
  
• Bent Knee Crunches (I want to one day show my mid drift)
  
• Bicycle Crunch (These are highly recommended for runners)
  
• Under-the-leg lifts (for those thunder thighs)
• Arm Running (recommend for runners) :: 60 second sets
  
• Ankle Balances (supposed to help prevent running injury) :: 30 seconds each leg
  
• Calf Raises (Also recommended for runners)
  

And for tomorrow, I have a 7 Miler which I am actually excited about! Go Figure!

Wishing everyone a wonderful weekend!

Oh where, Oh where has my motivation gone?

I'm pooped!

I wish I knew why I was so exhausted!

Yesterday's workout wasn't particularly hard. Kept it very easy. Did the elliptical for 60 minutes. My feet started to ache after about 45 min but I fought through. At least I got my sweat on (a little bit).

Today I'm thinking more about the future. I'm trying to get a Team together for the 13.1 Marathon™ - Ft. Lauderdale (in hopes of finding my motivation)

I've already got 5 people on our team so far:

1. Me
2. Mom
3. Mrs. Fireman
4. & 5. Two girls I work with.
   

Hope to get a team name and maybe have some t-shirts made :) that would be pretty neat!

This week I start the Half Marathon Training Plan which has me a little excited!

One step at a time :)

Also, gonna take a B vitamin which helps too.

Have a great day!